The Club

Ok, so you all know about "the Club", that stupid invention that one puts on their car steering wheel so no one steals it. Well, it is in almost every Canadian car down here. First off, is it the 1980s up there? I didn't even know they still made the club. Second of all, no one in our rinky-dink town is going to steal your car. If it's locked, it's fine. Even if it isn't locked, it's not likely to be stolen in a parking lot FULL OF PEOPLE! Fuck, people around here don't even lock their doors to their houses. Our city is about 1/10 the size of the 'big' city up there, and we only have 50,000 people. It's funny when we went up there because SO many cars had the damn club on them.

Along with their 1980s vibe, they wear the weirdest shit. Like fanny-packs. My God, it seems like all of them have one. They also wear their Canada shit down here. I know I've bitched about this before, but is it really fucking necessary to wear Canada shit wherever you go. Do you have to stand out from everyone. The only reason I can think of is that they do it *because* they stand out. They don't want to be associated with us because they think we are so below them. They treat us like shit most of the time and expect to be an exception to every rule just because they made the trip from Canada. Well, I suggest you return.

They also have weird hair. Like with 40 billion colors in it. Even on old ladies. I've seen purple, green, red (actual red, not the orangey natural shit), and combinations.

I hate the sight of their license plate, it sends me into a bitchfest, quite like the one you are experiencing now. They have the shittiest attitude and I don't think they even know it. My friends that work at restaurants say they don't tip... at all. Do they not know how to tip, or do they just not care. As you have read from my previous posts, they don't clean up after themselves. They will take a pair of shoes off the shelf, try them on, and leave them there, out of the box and everything. One of these days I am going to explode and go on a shooting rampage. Or I'll just tell them to act like civilized human beings. I didn't think one's nationality could be an excuse for everything they do. My friend had a Canadian call her from Canada and she forgot her purse in our store. She wanted us to mail her fucking purse to her. We obviously can't do this because we can't be held responsible if it got lost in the mail. What did she say to this..."But I'm from Canada." What the fuck!? If it gets used today, I will tell them off. And if they ask if we exchange money. NO! We are not a bank! What surprises me even more is that they freak out on ME because they can't and demand to know where they can. A BANK! Well, if the banks are closed again it's my fault. Hmmm, a simple solution: EXCHANGE YOUR FUCKING MONEY BEFORE YOU COME DOWN HERE!

What started my whole tirade today is that one of the major hotel chains in Canada is 'outreaching' to our city and building a hotel with an all-out waterpark right next to our arena. Our paper said how this will be good for the city because we'll have much more Canadian traffic down here. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! And soon, they'll be down here saying they are the reason the city prospers...oh wait they already do.

So in conclusion, if you want to see what the 1980s were like first hand, take a trip to Canada!