So this 'return season' has been much worse than any other previous year. We've had more people blow up about our return policy than ever before. It's getting kinda scary. They either have their receipt or they are an ASSHOLE. Recently one lady was just yelling at us, telling us to "make an exception" because she had a baby shower and already used her 2. No. I wish I could just argue with these people. So just because you had a fucking baby entitles you to more than 2? No. But that's enough bitching about that.
Except for when they throw out the whole, "What about the saying the customer is always right?" One lady asked me that, and I didn't say a thing because there was nothing nice to say. I've noticed that customers only say that when they are very, very wrong.
Some other woman told me how she went to a customer service seminar (ooh, how special) and they told her that if you quote the policy, that it means that it means more than the customer. And then she gave me this, 'What do you think about that?' look. I looked at her and just said, "I'm paid TO state the policy." Hey retard, I work in returns and abide by the fucking policy, you want to get around it and wonder why you can't, I'm gonna fucking state the policy. Maybe I need my own seminar.
Then on Wednesday, I cashier trained not once, but twice...and almost a 3rd time. The second time was with a exec who has been cashier-trained SO MANY TIMES but just doesn't get on a lane and do it. So I went through everything, and she was asking me questions about what my supervisors do, and of course I don't know all those details because, guess what? I'm not a supervisor. That whole day was a bit much.
Well anyways, I'll be working this weekend, and it brings out the worst in people, so I'm sure it will be another Bitch and Asshole Parade with many stops at Guest Service.
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Friday, January 12, 2007
I need a new job
And you probably agree with me.
Well, there were no monsters so to speak to deal with since the nasty bitch on Sunday, but it seems like more and more shit annoys the hell out of me.
Ok, so these Canadians come up to page their friend. So I page Donna Miller to Guest Service. Canadians, more so than other people, are so impatient. 30 seconds later the old wheezebag comes back up and says, "Page her again, you made it sound like DON Miller, she might not know it was her." So I get on the overhead thing AGAIN and enunciate Donna like you wouldn't believe. I was working with Amanda and she said she heard Donna the first time. We both rolled our eyes because we love Canadians so much. Well they come back up complaining that their friend isn't coming up. We give them this 'Well I don't control the universe' look and they go looking for her. Well they come back about 5 minutes later with their friend Don-na and bitch at us because Donna couldn't hear the page in Food Avenue, and I told them it's because it doesn't go overhead in Food Ave. They all started complaining as they left. Amanda said it perfectly when she said, "Invest in a fucking cell phone."
Another thing that pissed me off is that this guest was returning some coffee mugs that were wrapped in tissue paper. That's fine, but the bag was also filled with extra tissue paper and the receipt was at the bottom of the bag. So the woman sets her bag down and just stares at me. I fucking HATE when people do this, they just toss their bag on the counter and stare at you like you should bust your ass to do their return. So I reach in the bag, and with every movement of the tissue paper, the receipt moves, so it's like a chase. All of which the woman is staring at me. Nevermind that the sign says 'Please have your reciept ready' and no that doesn't mean at the bottom of the bag, it should be in your fucking hand ready to give it to me. And so I do the return and that's that.
Another thing I hate is when the guest doesn't say ANYTHING to you. "Is it defective?" Would you like it back on your card?" Those questions usually require a response. My favorite is when you combine the person that just stares at you AND says nothing. Saving the vocal cords to bitch someone out later? It's also fun when they don't say anything throughout the entire transaction, but tell you only after you finish that it's not what they want. "I don't want it back on my card!" And you couldn't have told me when I asked you if you wanted it on the card!?
Then there was this woman returning white wilted roses. Reason for return? "My husband bought me white ones, but I like red. Can I do an exchange?" She had her reciept so it's not like I could say no, but honestly? If my future wife exchanged flowers because she didn't like the fucking color, I would backhand her. Not really, but still. What a self-centered twat.
I know there were more topics I wanted to cover, but in one shift, you deal with a lot of shit. I like the comparison of working Guest Service is like being the eye of a hurricane. You stay calm while all the chaos occurs around you. I stole that comparison from "Behind the Counter", check it out in my links section. It's from another Customer Service person, but at Wal-mart. Gasp! it's very entertaining.
Well, there were no monsters so to speak to deal with since the nasty bitch on Sunday, but it seems like more and more shit annoys the hell out of me.
Ok, so these Canadians come up to page their friend. So I page Donna Miller to Guest Service. Canadians, more so than other people, are so impatient. 30 seconds later the old wheezebag comes back up and says, "Page her again, you made it sound like DON Miller, she might not know it was her." So I get on the overhead thing AGAIN and enunciate Donna like you wouldn't believe. I was working with Amanda and she said she heard Donna the first time. We both rolled our eyes because we love Canadians so much. Well they come back up complaining that their friend isn't coming up. We give them this 'Well I don't control the universe' look and they go looking for her. Well they come back about 5 minutes later with their friend Don-na and bitch at us because Donna couldn't hear the page in Food Avenue, and I told them it's because it doesn't go overhead in Food Ave. They all started complaining as they left. Amanda said it perfectly when she said, "Invest in a fucking cell phone."
Another thing that pissed me off is that this guest was returning some coffee mugs that were wrapped in tissue paper. That's fine, but the bag was also filled with extra tissue paper and the receipt was at the bottom of the bag. So the woman sets her bag down and just stares at me. I fucking HATE when people do this, they just toss their bag on the counter and stare at you like you should bust your ass to do their return. So I reach in the bag, and with every movement of the tissue paper, the receipt moves, so it's like a chase. All of which the woman is staring at me. Nevermind that the sign says 'Please have your reciept ready' and no that doesn't mean at the bottom of the bag, it should be in your fucking hand ready to give it to me. And so I do the return and that's that.
Another thing I hate is when the guest doesn't say ANYTHING to you. "Is it defective?" Would you like it back on your card?" Those questions usually require a response. My favorite is when you combine the person that just stares at you AND says nothing. Saving the vocal cords to bitch someone out later? It's also fun when they don't say anything throughout the entire transaction, but tell you only after you finish that it's not what they want. "I don't want it back on my card!" And you couldn't have told me when I asked you if you wanted it on the card!?
Then there was this woman returning white wilted roses. Reason for return? "My husband bought me white ones, but I like red. Can I do an exchange?" She had her reciept so it's not like I could say no, but honestly? If my future wife exchanged flowers because she didn't like the fucking color, I would backhand her. Not really, but still. What a self-centered twat.
I know there were more topics I wanted to cover, but in one shift, you deal with a lot of shit. I like the comparison of working Guest Service is like being the eye of a hurricane. You stay calm while all the chaos occurs around you. I stole that comparison from "Behind the Counter", check it out in my links section. It's from another Customer Service person, but at Wal-mart. Gasp! it's very entertaining.
Monday, January 08, 2007
6 Day Spree Finally Over
And out with a bang it went! Every single day except for Sunday, for reasons only known to assholes, was dead. Sunday was quite the other story. We have 6 registers at Guest Service and all of them were full at one point AND we still had a huge line. And apparently the nice people stayed home.
Which brings me to this one bitch I dealt with. So this old lady comes up and the first thing out of her mouth is, "You get to deal with me today." I think, 'Oh great, this shall be interesting' but I wasn't too concerned because I saw that she had her receipt. Boy, was I wrong. So she puts a boxed phone on the counter and goes into some story about how she bought the wrong phone, and somehow started talking about how she had bought a TV at Target a while ago and when she opened it, there was only a VCR in it. She was then bitching that the phone-in-a-box that she was returning looked opened, and that the employee put the wrong phone in her bag. So, being the retail drone that I am, I simply ask, "Is there anything wrong with the phone?" She yells, and I mean YELLS, "WERE YOU JUST NOT LISTENING TO ME!?" The head cashier was putting coins in my till and she just had these big eyes. Blanka was working on the till right next to me and she burst out laughing. The guy behind this bitch said, "Whoa!" So I give her an evil look, and say/yell, "Did you want to return it then?" She yells, "WELL OF COURSE!" And I say, "Then I need a receipt." I do the return and credit her card, and after I'm done, she asks again, "Did you not listen to anything I said?" I simply looked at her, and said, "Have a nice day!" But honestly, she did not say one thing pertaining to the quality of the phone. The box looked like it was opened, so I asked if there was anything wrong with it because THAT'S WHAT WE DO! Normal people just say no, there is never a need to be a total bitch about it. I remember everything she said to me, but what the fuck does a TV have to do with the phone you plopped onto the counter?
We also had another bitch on a previous day. This woman wants to return a Barbie play dress. Well, it doesn't have the barcode on it, and she doesn't have her receipt, so we tell her she needs to go back to Toys and find the exact same thing, and we'll see what we can do for her. So she brings the dress with the barcode up and we attempt a receipt look-up using a plethora of her cards. We can't find it on there, which brings us to the no-receipt return policy. Well the dress had been clearanced down to $10.48 and she would have to exchange it for another item in Toys for that price or greater. She throws a shit fit. She starts bitching about how we are ripping her off, and that the peg that it was on said $17.99, and how the receipt look-up was wrong. Well we called Sharon up, and she told her the same thing. But the lady was freaking out, and wanted to show someone what peg it was on. So Sharon does the return and puts it on a giftcard (a big no-no by the way) and went back with her. Well, the dresses on the peg in question were a completely different dress, but the lady continued to freak out saying that it was still a Barbie dress. I don't know what else was said, but Sharon said she was glad to see her go.
Sometimes the VPWT (VERY poor white trash) wanders into our store from Wal-mart and it isn't pretty. Well, some Job Service-esque type company gave this woman a $50 voucher to Target to get some decent interview clothes. It even said what she needed to buy; stuff like black pants, nice shirt, etc. Well this Mr. Yuck sticker contender got what she wanted, but it only came out to be $40ish. She, being trashy, wanted the rest in cash. They said they couldn't do that, and the woman flipped out and she was swearing up a storm. She left saying that it was "fucking ridiculous!" Well she comes in the next day, and started bitching that we didn't put the stuff on hold for her, and that she couldn't find what she was going to get anymore, so she tried buying slippers and food with it, and they told her no obviously. Again she swore up a storm and huffed her way out of the store. Any wonder why this woman can't get a job!? I think it's a bit past what she wears...
With this no-receipt return policy, Target only allows a person 2 no receipt returns or exchanges per year. It's technically supposed to be 2 items, but we can usually put a few items onto one transaction (although we aren't supposed to) just to be nice. That niceness wore out for me on Sunday. First there was this one woman who went to another employee and when she found out she could only return 2 of her 4 items, she threw them all her her cart and stormed out. She THREW them in her cart! Like the items bounced in the fucking cart!
Then there was this other guy who I had the 'pleasure' of dealing with. He exchanging blinds, and he goes to get the ones he wants. When he comes back, I ask if he has a receipt. He says no, and I ask him how he paid for them. He says, "I don't know." And then I say, "Well if you paid by credit card, debit card, or check we can try looking it up." He says, "I just want to do an exchange." And little asshole me snaps back, "Well Target requires a receipt for all returns and exchanges, would you like me to try your credit card?" "No! I just want to do an exchange!" So I tell him that Target only allows 2 no receipt returns/exchanges per year and that he would use up both of them. If he weren't an asshole I would have done them on one transaction, but this ass didn't deserve it. He goes into a tirade about how he's never shopping here again, and that he'll just go to Wal-mart from now on because it's 'less of a hassle'. Good-fuckin'-bye! Honestly, why is it so hard to hang onto a receipt!? And why is it SUCH a hassle to let me try to look up your receipt? Fuck! That's fine! I'm sure Wal-mart would love to have your piss poor attitude in their store.
So I'm glad it's over, and I have a whopping 2 days off. Woo hoo... Anyways, after this holiday season, I'm glad to get back into school because it means I'll be spending less time at the HELLHOLE. And if I get into my program, this will be my last few months of retail... We shall see...
Which brings me to this one bitch I dealt with. So this old lady comes up and the first thing out of her mouth is, "You get to deal with me today." I think, 'Oh great, this shall be interesting' but I wasn't too concerned because I saw that she had her receipt. Boy, was I wrong. So she puts a boxed phone on the counter and goes into some story about how she bought the wrong phone, and somehow started talking about how she had bought a TV at Target a while ago and when she opened it, there was only a VCR in it. She was then bitching that the phone-in-a-box that she was returning looked opened, and that the employee put the wrong phone in her bag. So, being the retail drone that I am, I simply ask, "Is there anything wrong with the phone?" She yells, and I mean YELLS, "WERE YOU JUST NOT LISTENING TO ME!?" The head cashier was putting coins in my till and she just had these big eyes. Blanka was working on the till right next to me and she burst out laughing. The guy behind this bitch said, "Whoa!" So I give her an evil look, and say/yell, "Did you want to return it then?" She yells, "WELL OF COURSE!" And I say, "Then I need a receipt." I do the return and credit her card, and after I'm done, she asks again, "Did you not listen to anything I said?" I simply looked at her, and said, "Have a nice day!" But honestly, she did not say one thing pertaining to the quality of the phone. The box looked like it was opened, so I asked if there was anything wrong with it because THAT'S WHAT WE DO! Normal people just say no, there is never a need to be a total bitch about it. I remember everything she said to me, but what the fuck does a TV have to do with the phone you plopped onto the counter?
We also had another bitch on a previous day. This woman wants to return a Barbie play dress. Well, it doesn't have the barcode on it, and she doesn't have her receipt, so we tell her she needs to go back to Toys and find the exact same thing, and we'll see what we can do for her. So she brings the dress with the barcode up and we attempt a receipt look-up using a plethora of her cards. We can't find it on there, which brings us to the no-receipt return policy. Well the dress had been clearanced down to $10.48 and she would have to exchange it for another item in Toys for that price or greater. She throws a shit fit. She starts bitching about how we are ripping her off, and that the peg that it was on said $17.99, and how the receipt look-up was wrong. Well we called Sharon up, and she told her the same thing. But the lady was freaking out, and wanted to show someone what peg it was on. So Sharon does the return and puts it on a giftcard (a big no-no by the way) and went back with her. Well, the dresses on the peg in question were a completely different dress, but the lady continued to freak out saying that it was still a Barbie dress. I don't know what else was said, but Sharon said she was glad to see her go.
Sometimes the VPWT (VERY poor white trash) wanders into our store from Wal-mart and it isn't pretty. Well, some Job Service-esque type company gave this woman a $50 voucher to Target to get some decent interview clothes. It even said what she needed to buy; stuff like black pants, nice shirt, etc. Well this Mr. Yuck sticker contender got what she wanted, but it only came out to be $40ish. She, being trashy, wanted the rest in cash. They said they couldn't do that, and the woman flipped out and she was swearing up a storm. She left saying that it was "fucking ridiculous!" Well she comes in the next day, and started bitching that we didn't put the stuff on hold for her, and that she couldn't find what she was going to get anymore, so she tried buying slippers and food with it, and they told her no obviously. Again she swore up a storm and huffed her way out of the store. Any wonder why this woman can't get a job!? I think it's a bit past what she wears...
With this no-receipt return policy, Target only allows a person 2 no receipt returns or exchanges per year. It's technically supposed to be 2 items, but we can usually put a few items onto one transaction (although we aren't supposed to) just to be nice. That niceness wore out for me on Sunday. First there was this one woman who went to another employee and when she found out she could only return 2 of her 4 items, she threw them all her her cart and stormed out. She THREW them in her cart! Like the items bounced in the fucking cart!
Then there was this other guy who I had the 'pleasure' of dealing with. He exchanging blinds, and he goes to get the ones he wants. When he comes back, I ask if he has a receipt. He says no, and I ask him how he paid for them. He says, "I don't know." And then I say, "Well if you paid by credit card, debit card, or check we can try looking it up." He says, "I just want to do an exchange." And little asshole me snaps back, "Well Target requires a receipt for all returns and exchanges, would you like me to try your credit card?" "No! I just want to do an exchange!" So I tell him that Target only allows 2 no receipt returns/exchanges per year and that he would use up both of them. If he weren't an asshole I would have done them on one transaction, but this ass didn't deserve it. He goes into a tirade about how he's never shopping here again, and that he'll just go to Wal-mart from now on because it's 'less of a hassle'. Good-fuckin'-bye! Honestly, why is it so hard to hang onto a receipt!? And why is it SUCH a hassle to let me try to look up your receipt? Fuck! That's fine! I'm sure Wal-mart would love to have your piss poor attitude in their store.
So I'm glad it's over, and I have a whopping 2 days off. Woo hoo... Anyways, after this holiday season, I'm glad to get back into school because it means I'll be spending less time at the HELLHOLE. And if I get into my program, this will be my last few months of retail... We shall see...
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
No changes
Well, as I said earlier it was my lonely little self up at Guest Service yesterday, just over a week after Xmas and it was (surprise!) still busy. I get there at 2:30, and of course it's a fucking mess. I'd hate to see what GS looks like when I don't work because I swear I'm the only one over there with an attention to cleanliness. There was shit all over the counters, and the others aren't entirely to blame because there was always a line of people, but what I do is just ignore the line of people when I'm cleaning up the mess. They waited this long to return their shit, they can wait a few seconds more. Well, in no time I'm pissed off because it's just me and it's really busy. I'm pressing the back-up button constantly and when someone comes up to help, it helps a little until they leave and then it gets even busier. A never ending suckfest cycle.
People are still crabby as ever and it's getting old. I don't even empathize with people anymore. In fact I don't care. I'm especially sick of reciting the no-receipt return policy, and then having people ask, "Can't I just get a giftcard?" No, you dumb fuck, if it were an option, I would have said so, do you think I like telling morons like you the whole policy ordeal? As you can see I'm a little bitter.
My favorite thing to do is when another employee brings random shit up to GS. I don't read minds so I don't know what you want me to do with this one mitten, because it's going in the garbage. I love throwing shit away. I'm sorry, but if you don't tell me what to do with it, and I can't figure it out, it goes in the garbage.
Well, I have 5 more straight days of work, and then I start class again, so really the only "break" I got was when I went to my cousin's wedding this past weekend. Woohoo... I've been working otherwise. Well, I better go run my errands before work, because I'll have no other time to do it with all this work.
People are still crabby as ever and it's getting old. I don't even empathize with people anymore. In fact I don't care. I'm especially sick of reciting the no-receipt return policy, and then having people ask, "Can't I just get a giftcard?" No, you dumb fuck, if it were an option, I would have said so, do you think I like telling morons like you the whole policy ordeal? As you can see I'm a little bitter.
My favorite thing to do is when another employee brings random shit up to GS. I don't read minds so I don't know what you want me to do with this one mitten, because it's going in the garbage. I love throwing shit away. I'm sorry, but if you don't tell me what to do with it, and I can't figure it out, it goes in the garbage.
Well, I have 5 more straight days of work, and then I start class again, so really the only "break" I got was when I went to my cousin's wedding this past weekend. Woohoo... I've been working otherwise. Well, I better go run my errands before work, because I'll have no other time to do it with all this work.
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